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I don't know how to start this entry...but I have realized a lot of things the past few months.
I have been in the whole fandom for about 10 years and in SixTONES fandom for about 7 years. Some may think that all these years just feel like yesterday and some may consider these feel like forever.
Over these years, I always think that I should be responsible for this and that, do this and that for the fandom, and considered fandom to be one of my main priorities.
But over the past few months, I have realized what I really want to do, to pursue, and to prioritize. Strangely, I've found myself that fandom is not in my top "priorities" anymore.
I don't get hyped up at things that used to hype me so much before. I easily accept things that used to be not okay...
Did not watch their shows during the airing time? It's okay
Did not get to download this certain performance? It's fine
Choosing to read a book or watch a show over doing translations during my free time? It's alright
Was not able to buy this magazine or that whatever merch they have? No problem
Want to organize an event for them? Nope, I can't with my abilities.
President of the 6T fandom in Ph? I humbly decline this position. I am not up for the responsibility that comes along with it.
I finally found myself saying no to things and felt okay with it.
Oh well, it's not like I'm gonna quit the fandom anyway. I'll continue to be a fan but not that 24/7 hyped up and energetic kind of fan. I want to be chill and tweet whenever I can and watch their shows whenever I feel like. I don't know if I will still do translations (most probably not, as I lost my passion in doing this) but there are a lot of other fans who are more competent and passionate than I am.
Understanding these things made me feel free from what I thought to be fandom responsibilities and guilts, and can finally run at my own pace again. I'm truly happy about this realization.
If you've reached until this point, thank you for reading my mumbling.
Over these years, I always think that I should be responsible for this and that, do this and that for the fandom, and considered fandom to be one of my main priorities.
But over the past few months, I have realized what I really want to do, to pursue, and to prioritize. Strangely, I've found myself that fandom is not in my top "priorities" anymore.
I don't get hyped up at things that used to hype me so much before. I easily accept things that used to be not okay...
Did not watch their shows during the airing time? It's okay
Did not get to download this certain performance? It's fine
Choosing to read a book or watch a show over doing translations during my free time? It's alright
Was not able to buy this magazine or that whatever merch they have? No problem
Want to organize an event for them? Nope, I can't with my abilities.
President of the 6T fandom in Ph? I humbly decline this position. I am not up for the responsibility that comes along with it.
I finally found myself saying no to things and felt okay with it.
Oh well, it's not like I'm gonna quit the fandom anyway. I'll continue to be a fan but not that 24/7 hyped up and energetic kind of fan. I want to be chill and tweet whenever I can and watch their shows whenever I feel like. I don't know if I will still do translations (most probably not, as I lost my passion in doing this) but there are a lot of other fans who are more competent and passionate than I am.
Understanding these things made me feel free from what I thought to be fandom responsibilities and guilts, and can finally run at my own pace again. I'm truly happy about this realization.
If you've reached until this point, thank you for reading my mumbling.
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